I hit the ground after the distinctive sounds of ligaments and tendons being tormented beyond limits from my right ankle. I rolled on the ground in pain as pain shot through my body causing a combination of nausea and uncontrolled sound of pain. And there I rolled until the pain passed. No one came to help. And it was my fault.
Our dogs had dug a hole in the grass long, long ago and I kept saying I will fill it in later. Instead I finally stepped in it and rolled my ankle.
Leave a hole around long enough, and eventually someone will step in it. And often times get hurt. There are often times things in our lives that cause holes. Attitudes, behaviors, resentment, addiction, or any other host of poor choices. Living in denial they exist, not filling them in will eventually lead to some wounds.
It is amazing what we get used to living with. Other people see all the holes getting bigger and more dangerous and we seem to ignore them. It is exactly how relationships are ruined, addictions develop and faith is side lined. I think I was told a bunch of times about that hole. And just kept putting it off. Not my problem. Too busy. No harm. Until the day came when all of that was changed in a flash due to one wrong step.
Living in Gods love and grace is one way we are reminded to pay attention to the holes. Living in Gods grace allows us to understand part of faith IS to be convicted of our fault, sin and holes we dig or have around us. Living in Gods love and grace allows us to understand others may see things we do not, and point them out. Living in Gods love and grace is meant to help fill the holes NOT walk around thinking that grace will protect us from stepping into them.
The hole is filled. The pain is passing. I have grown. But without the pain, the hole would still be there. I am grateful I did not break my ankle.
And in the end….. I never did fill the hole myself. I asked for help because I wanted it done, and I was in too much pain. How much pain can you inflict, can you bear, before you ask for help? When it comes to people, places and things this is always a dangerous edge. When it comes to God, there is always grace, love and forgiveness. It is important to remember the difference.
Have a great week – Pr. Rob